The Call.
over the weekend, aylen and I received a special call. I was not here to get it unfortunately, but aylen was. It was from our friend in basic training. he became a friend through wow, and kind of grew on us. lol. he is the youngest in the guild, well sort of, at the age of 22. Then today, it hit me, he would have had to been born in 1988. I started remembering all the things that happened in 88, where i was, cars, music, movies, and I thought, wow, that seems like so recently. It does scare me that he may go to war, and may never come back. We do not like to think of that ever happening, but it could certainly happen. I will say that when i first met Aaron, I had no idea I would be with aylen. I met her after meeting Aaron in game. all that said, the 15Th marked the 10 month anniversary of me and my love. With her, the time has seemingly gone by so fast. I consider it extraordinary that we have survived each other so well. I can tell you I am certainly not the easiest person to deal with all times. Yes I know an understatement. lol. Her nature is at times very curious to me. she can go from being so harsh to most to being so loving. It is wonderful. I feel as if sometimes she understands me better then I understand myself. she seems to know when to push the limits, and when to back off. In a lot of ways, I suppose we both do that. That ability does not come from being well trained as a kajira, it comes from having our hearts intertwined and beating together. I have thought of it like this. 2 hearts on a parallel path, moving along. Now then things can happen along the way, that is life. It is how you deal with the bumps along the way that helps to get the hearts closer together. If both hearts are receptive, the hearts grow together, getting stronger with every beat. Then, the miraculous happens, if one heart hurts, they both do. If you would have told me that aylen and I would have been so compatible, I would not have believed you. I am , however, very glad we are. I love her, in all of her silly times, and even serious times. I know that no matter the obstacle, we can pull through together. We have recently seen a few movies, we managed to get all 3 pirates of the Caribbean, and I can say I did not expect that ending. we also saw the the da vinci code, and the things they said were things I had heard on the history channel. It would seem that no matter the movie, aylen and I just genuinely enjoy each other's company. A good thing too eh? Anyway, that is all that is currently on my mind, and until next time, be well


Spencer

Pressure

pressure.*starts humming billy Joel* I must say I have felt like the weight of the world has been dumped on my shoulders as of late. My only solace in all of this is my heart, aylen has been there for me to help me pull through. Honestly I am not sure what i would have done without her bringing me back to reality when i get too far gone. I can tell you I have stopped worrying about my mother, what ever will be will be. However, I have something new to worry about. I have become increasingly paranoid about my job performance reviews. It is something i plan on addressing with my supervisor on monday. I have apparently been graded on a few bad calls, and I am becoming fearful if I will lose my job over it. Honestly I do not think it will go that far, but i feel as if i have a target on my back. I feel almost afraid to answer the phone for fear of another bad report. Now, mind you, that is no way to go through life worried about such, but I sometimes feel if my "judge" is being a bit too overzealous at times. Another thing that has caused my stress this weekend was my dedicated queue that I am in. We had a Major plan recently go with what is known as the mchoice plan, which is basically a mandatory mail order plan with the option of getting the rx at a local cvs pharmacy. The problem with that is, if the person does not have a cvs around them, they are sol. that can be very stressful to me at times. Ok so I know this blog is late. I have learned much of myself in these past few days. 1, I love seeing movies with aylen. it is always a good time for us I feel. I have seen quite a few lately, too many to mention, but all good. I have also come to realize that my feelings put me in an odd position at times. Recently, Aylen pulled a muscle in her neck. I never realized how seeing her in so much pain bothered me. It just kills me, because I do not like to see anything in pain, it is truly not my style. The feelings I have are so much deeper for her then anyone else I have ever encountered. I would hate to think if anything serious ever happened to her. I would be devastated. I suppose I just have to cross my fingers that something catastrophic does not happen like that. Her luck has held out so far, let us hope it continues on it's path. I said I could not mention the movies, but I will mention the one from today. Aylen and I got t see alice in wonderland. We were admittedly a bit puzzled when we saw the movie was directed by tim burton and a disney movie to boot. for those that do not know, those 2 things are something I never anticipated seeing. It was actually really good. A bit bizarre for a disney movie, though. lol.
anyway, I have a few more days until the next one, so I am signing off.

Spencer